An Update to Small Group Leaders | Girls Ministry Fall 2013

Hi there,
I want to give a little update on the life of our Girls Ministry.  What a whirlwind of a semester! Or is it just me that feels that way?  It has flown by and it’s already time for Christmas party planning to start! What?!
I wanted to let you all know that I’m very thankful for each of you that are involved in our girls’ lives.  It means so much that they have you walking through life with them, caring for them, listening to them.  I hear stories from so many of our girls of what an impact our small group leaders are making on their lives.  So if they don’t always say so to you, let me tell you on their behalf that you matter and are making a difference in their lives.  I know we tell you all the time, but we really couldn’t do ministry without you all.  It would be impossible for the us to know all the students the way that you all do.  So thank you!

I got a text today from one of our 11^th grade girls that made my heart sing.  It led me to realize that you all might want to be updated on some things I’ve seen God do in our girls this semester.  So much!  He is so good and faithful, even when the days seem crazy or darker than usual.

So here are a few ways that the Lord is moving in our girls:

Girls desiring to know Scripture – This has shown up several times over the past few weeks.  One girl told me in the text mentioned earlier, “BG I really need to get to learn the stories of the Bible better.  I think they’re super interesting.”  What?!  This is a dream text to get.  Usually I get texts about boy drama, or fights between girls…but no, this girl desires to know scripture more. And it’s not just her.  I’ve had conversations with several students desiring to know how to know the Bible better.  This is a cool way that God is moving in their hearts. I can’t tell you how exciting it is to know that they want to know God better. Yay!

Community built – I’ve seen so many instances this semester where our girls are finding true friendships.  I think for a while our students would come, know some people on surface levels, and then go home and hang out with school friends.  I've seen over the past semester friendships form that go beyond schools and the church.  They call each other out when they miss church or are not walking the right path.  They have sleepovers without prompting from adults; they are doing life together and encouraging each other in their relationships with Christ.  I think some may see it as “cliques” but I don’t know that they’re exclusive. Sometimes they are, but I think our students have grown over the past semester in accepting new people. This is cool to me!  These friendships share something greater than many school friendships do - they share Christ.  Those who play basketball together share basketball and once basketball season ends, they might have a few things in common, but many times those friendships fade.  Church friendships seem to last, or at least what I've noticed, because they share a relationship with Christ. 
Another aspect of community is that girls will go to their small group leaders or other members of their small groups before other people when there’s a problem.  They have trust and security within our ministry.  There are also girls sticking up for other girls in hard situations, the love and support they show – and you show – when things get tough for families or friends.  Within our community, they laugh together, hurt together, cry together, are goofy together, and move on together.  This is really encouraging to be part of and to see.

Girls on the fringe – I made a list this year of all the girls active in our ministry.  Whoa, there’s a lot!  And we’ve grown throughout the semester, with new people.  With this list, I started to sort of mark off the ones that I knew well or have conversations with regularly, and that hit a good number of them, but definitely not all.  So then I started to look at who they were and reach out to them and what I learned was that many of the ones I considered “on the fringe” –because I didn’t necessarily know them – were actually plugged in with other girls or with their small groups.  And many of them have just gotten plugged in this semester.  Some that were coming with their boyfriends actually have friends among other girls.  And many of the new girls have come, stuck, and gotten very plugged in.  Like several of the girls in the middle school worship team; they are new-ish and already leading.  There are still some that are probably “on the fringe,” but this semester has been one of community.  I can’t reach them all, but with your help and with the help of our girls, they can be known and cared for.  Cool.

The counseling room – anyone know what I’m talking about?  Yup.  The bathroom.  Can I just tell you how many times I’ve walked in awkwardly to the bathroom only to find girls crying or hashing out drama?  One particular Wednesday night I walked in on two girls, one was sobbing with the other trying to comfort her.  I stopped to listen and help, but then a visitor walked in on them and the awkwardness continued.  Not to say that this is bad.  It opened up a good conversation later with the visitor.  But the cool thing about this moment was that I wasn’t needed to help this sobbing girl.  The friend had it all under control.  And this bathroom is a place of comfort to the girls.  I asked a small group Sunday how they felt about it, and they all agreed that it was the safe place to cry, collect themselves, and deal with drama.  In the bathroom. Nice.  This happened with some middle schoolers one Sunday morning too.  The bathroom drama stories could be endless, and I’m sure many of you know what I’m talking about.  It is cool that our girls are at a place where they are able to help one another, comfort each other, and walk in life together. 
As a side note, I’m thinking of painting the bathroom a happier color and putting Bible verses of comfort around.  Any ideas are welcomed!

Called to Ministry – so many conversations this semester have revolved around our girls wanting to do ministry.  There are several girls feeling the call to ministry.  God is at work, people!  I love hearing girls come to know Christ, and I love when they make friends, and I love that they have a desire for Scripture.  But for some reason, maybe because it’s impacted me personally, when I hear girls tell me or others that they want to do ministry for life, I get giddy.  I think that this reflects the fruit of their relationship with Christ more than some other things.  It means that they really get what Christ is calling us to do and are being selfless enough to understand giving their lives, hopes and dreams to Christ.  There are girls that want to do girls ministry, student ministry, missions, and beyond.  Some are already doing this.  I know a 9^th grader that is leading FCA at Wakeland.  She’s teaching senior football players the Bible.  Not just the happy stories either; she told me she’s teaching on “getting out of the boat,” being connected to the vine (John 15), and calling them all out on the type of language they use.  Awesome!  Others are leading in their schools or within the ministry.  I can’t wait to see how God uses so many of them the rest of this year, and beyond high school and college.

I know that you all have so many stories of what God is doing in your small groups and in your ministries.  I would LOVE to hear them!  We only see a glimpse of what is happening, and so we love to hear your stories.  So be encouraged that God is at work.  He is doing great things in our ministry, and will continue to use you and our girls.  I’m thankful that God has put me in this church, this ministry, and that He is moving in the lives of our girls.
Love,
Brittany

You Know You're in Girls Ministry When....

You know you're a girls minister when you hear things like:

• Girl 1: Brittany, you'd be proud of me. There was a stripper pole on the party bus and I didn't even dance on it!
• Girl 1: I didn't dance on it, but Girl 2 did. She's really good at it. Girl 2: It's my new profession!
• Girl 3, about giving birth: I wouldn't like for my legs to be all open with all those people around. Girl 1: That's how I am all the time!
• Girl 4: I hid the glo-sticks in my bosoms!
• Boy 1: Brittany, I'm having girl problems... *continues to spill drama worse than girls do*
• Boy: That's what the girls fall for: the baby face...
• Girl 5: Jesus' mother was Mary. Oh my gosh! I wonder if Mary had a little lamb?!!
• Girl 4: No. We don't kiss boys.  At least not until we're like 40!
• State your name and a weird fact: Girl 6: She's Girl 7, and she loves One Direction so much that she knows all their blood types.
• Girl 7: And I know 1D's birthdays. You don't????
• Boy 2: I'm going to come to the girls' paint war party. Hittin' up the ladiessss!
• Intern: Brittany, your coffee addiction has rubbed off on me after spending so much time with you this summer...
• Youth Minister: I'm trying to be manly!
• Girl: Jesus was subtweeting in the story of the Good Samaritan. Awesome.
• Girl: Momma doesn't let me use the decorative soap!
• Youth Minister: Brittany, can you come build my desk/fix this thing with these tools, etc...
• Girl: Brittany, we need to talk. I think I want to go into ministry when I grow up.
• Girl: What do you want to be when you get out of college? Girl: A Brittany. Or just a girls minister.
• Girl: Brittany, I have friends now. Thanks for praying for my small group.
• Girl: Today I accepted Jesus into my heart.
• Girl: Brittany, You're my best friend!
• Girl: I just wanted to call from college and tell you how awesome my life is right now and all the great things God is doing!

You see things like:

• Girls painting boys' toenails in your living room
• Bible study turned into dance parties
• Lots of tears and emotions
• Girls calling you from the school dance to fix her broken dress
• Student Minister wearing bows for VBS
• Lots of laughter
• Volleyball games twice a week
• Girls finding community
• High school girls taking interest in the middle schoolers
• Students called to ministry, surrendering life

You say things like:

• Girl, when we wear skirts, we keep our knees or ankles together.
• No, girl, you can't sit however you want.  We try to be ladylike.
• Girl, let's not wear shirts quite so low.
• Why is the coffee always gone so fast?
• Girls, Jesus' love for His people is like Hosea's after a whore's
• We are so similar to the Whores of the Bible. Redeemed.
• Let's not play hair and make-up in church services.
• Hey Baptist Congregation, Let's all stand up and dance...
• Girl, your hair is huge today! (oops...)
• You are God's masterpiece and He loves you so much

A Little Tea Party!

Previously in our student ministry, the girls ministry consisted of a girls retreat in the Fall, Revolve Tour in the Spring, and coffee dates the rest of the year.  (As well as supporting the general student ministry happenings).  Well, after review of a Girls Ministry's purpose and goals, we have changed what we're doing.  Girls ministry is best done throughout the year, and my goal this year is to know more girls that tend to be on the "fringe," doing things that are more "grade-specific."  So we're doing many small events this Fall, trying to include more girls. Thinking through this has stretched me, creatively, more than I thought it would.  It has also taught me a bit of how to diversify for different ages.  6th Graders don't always need to hear what 11th and 12th Grade girls do.

So our first event was for the 6th grade girls.  We had a tea party!!  I wanted to share some of my ideas of what we did.
Purpose:  The goal of the night was to make the girls feel special, girly, and like the princesses that they are.  We talked about how we are daughters of the King and that he loves us so much. As their first official student ministry event, I told them how excited I am that they are now part of the student ministry and that God is going to do big things with their time in this student ministry.  We talked about being valued in God's eyes and shining for Him like Princesses in their schools.

How to Tea Party: 
The Invites: I used invitations from this great site that were easy to edit.  I gave them to the girls a few weeks in advance.  They were cute little reminders.
The Food: Because 6th Grade girls are probably not too thrilled about hot tea, I tweaked the script and we served pink lemonade (what drink is more girly?) and raspberry tea.  The girls were pretty excited about the raspberry tea, and had red mustaches the rest of the night!  I ordered cupcakes from my favorite cupcake bakery, Dimples Cupcake Factory which was a hit! Those cupcakes are huge!

  
We drank out of mason jars, and the girls thought that was very special! Haha!  The goal was girly, so I tied ribbons and put tulle everywhere!  To go along with the lemonade theme, I found awesome Hubert's lemonade bottles (after drinking the delicious lemonade, of course) and they contributed to centerpieces.  The tables also had some mason jars with lemon drops and whoppers (malt balls) in them.  I really wanted some giant pink gumballs, but couldn't find any that were cost-efficient enough.

What we did:  When the girls got to the party, they mingled a bit and started drinking and eating snacks.  I had put on the tables these super cute cutouts of cupcakes that they played with as girls were walking in.  It was nice for them to have something to do with their hands and to do, because with 6th graders sometimes conversation with new people are awkward.
(Apparently I didn't take a picture of the actual cutouts)
I also found these free cutouts to make your own photo booth! The girls really loved this! It was really easy to make, I just printed these out on cardstock and cut away.  I set up a banner in a corner and it made for a perfect photobooth!

Finally, we played some get-to-know-you games because I didn't know everyone and they didn't either.  We spent thirty minutes learning names and random facts about each other.
Then, as time came to almost leave, we waited for parents and played "pterodactyl" which is played by keeping your teeth covered at all times. The person to your left tries to make you smile and show your teeth by making weird noises and saying "pterodactyl."  We laughed so much!



These girls are some high school students who helped with the evening. It was awesome to have them invest in younger girls and to have them help with setup and cleanup!
In hindsight, I would change a few things.  I would not host this event on a Friday night during Texas football season.  I didn't think that high school football would affect 6th graders, but this group of girls has many older siblings and a large group of the 6th grade girls went to the football games, which was a bummer to me.
Overall, the evening was a success.  The girls who came were known and I feel like they felt special.  They heard truth and had fun in the process.  Even though not as many girls came as I thought were coming, the ones that did were girls I didn't know as well, so it was a good opportunity for me to meet them.  Not a lot of planning was needed because the girls just wanted to talk and be silly! Their stories were random, but they were heard and are important to the girls.

New Blog Launch

Hey folks!

As many of you know, I'm a girls minister for FBC Frisco. And in trying to be the best girls minister I can be, I have launched a new blog that chronicles learnings from girls ministry. It's partly documenting my journey to figuring out what it means to be a girls minister and also hopefully a resource for others in the field of girls ministry. I'll still keep this blog updated, but I'd love it if you checked out this other blog: 

Girls Ministry Learnings:

https://girlsministrythoughts.wordpress.com/

Also, happenings from our student ministry/girls ministry can be found here: https://bluegirlsministry.wordpress.com/ 

May The Lord bless an keep you and may His favor shine upon you. 

Happy weekend!!