An Update to Small Group Leaders | Girls Ministry Fall 2013

Hi there,
I want to give a little update on the life of our Girls Ministry.  What a whirlwind of a semester! Or is it just me that feels that way?  It has flown by and it’s already time for Christmas party planning to start! What?!
I wanted to let you all know that I’m very thankful for each of you that are involved in our girls’ lives.  It means so much that they have you walking through life with them, caring for them, listening to them.  I hear stories from so many of our girls of what an impact our small group leaders are making on their lives.  So if they don’t always say so to you, let me tell you on their behalf that you matter and are making a difference in their lives.  I know we tell you all the time, but we really couldn’t do ministry without you all.  It would be impossible for the us to know all the students the way that you all do.  So thank you!

I got a text today from one of our 11^th grade girls that made my heart sing.  It led me to realize that you all might want to be updated on some things I’ve seen God do in our girls this semester.  So much!  He is so good and faithful, even when the days seem crazy or darker than usual.

So here are a few ways that the Lord is moving in our girls:

Girls desiring to know Scripture – This has shown up several times over the past few weeks.  One girl told me in the text mentioned earlier, “BG I really need to get to learn the stories of the Bible better.  I think they’re super interesting.”  What?!  This is a dream text to get.  Usually I get texts about boy drama, or fights between girls…but no, this girl desires to know scripture more. And it’s not just her.  I’ve had conversations with several students desiring to know how to know the Bible better.  This is a cool way that God is moving in their hearts. I can’t tell you how exciting it is to know that they want to know God better. Yay!

Community built – I’ve seen so many instances this semester where our girls are finding true friendships.  I think for a while our students would come, know some people on surface levels, and then go home and hang out with school friends.  I've seen over the past semester friendships form that go beyond schools and the church.  They call each other out when they miss church or are not walking the right path.  They have sleepovers without prompting from adults; they are doing life together and encouraging each other in their relationships with Christ.  I think some may see it as “cliques” but I don’t know that they’re exclusive. Sometimes they are, but I think our students have grown over the past semester in accepting new people. This is cool to me!  These friendships share something greater than many school friendships do - they share Christ.  Those who play basketball together share basketball and once basketball season ends, they might have a few things in common, but many times those friendships fade.  Church friendships seem to last, or at least what I've noticed, because they share a relationship with Christ. 
Another aspect of community is that girls will go to their small group leaders or other members of their small groups before other people when there’s a problem.  They have trust and security within our ministry.  There are also girls sticking up for other girls in hard situations, the love and support they show – and you show – when things get tough for families or friends.  Within our community, they laugh together, hurt together, cry together, are goofy together, and move on together.  This is really encouraging to be part of and to see.

Girls on the fringe – I made a list this year of all the girls active in our ministry.  Whoa, there’s a lot!  And we’ve grown throughout the semester, with new people.  With this list, I started to sort of mark off the ones that I knew well or have conversations with regularly, and that hit a good number of them, but definitely not all.  So then I started to look at who they were and reach out to them and what I learned was that many of the ones I considered “on the fringe” –because I didn’t necessarily know them – were actually plugged in with other girls or with their small groups.  And many of them have just gotten plugged in this semester.  Some that were coming with their boyfriends actually have friends among other girls.  And many of the new girls have come, stuck, and gotten very plugged in.  Like several of the girls in the middle school worship team; they are new-ish and already leading.  There are still some that are probably “on the fringe,” but this semester has been one of community.  I can’t reach them all, but with your help and with the help of our girls, they can be known and cared for.  Cool.

The counseling room – anyone know what I’m talking about?  Yup.  The bathroom.  Can I just tell you how many times I’ve walked in awkwardly to the bathroom only to find girls crying or hashing out drama?  One particular Wednesday night I walked in on two girls, one was sobbing with the other trying to comfort her.  I stopped to listen and help, but then a visitor walked in on them and the awkwardness continued.  Not to say that this is bad.  It opened up a good conversation later with the visitor.  But the cool thing about this moment was that I wasn’t needed to help this sobbing girl.  The friend had it all under control.  And this bathroom is a place of comfort to the girls.  I asked a small group Sunday how they felt about it, and they all agreed that it was the safe place to cry, collect themselves, and deal with drama.  In the bathroom. Nice.  This happened with some middle schoolers one Sunday morning too.  The bathroom drama stories could be endless, and I’m sure many of you know what I’m talking about.  It is cool that our girls are at a place where they are able to help one another, comfort each other, and walk in life together. 
As a side note, I’m thinking of painting the bathroom a happier color and putting Bible verses of comfort around.  Any ideas are welcomed!

Called to Ministry – so many conversations this semester have revolved around our girls wanting to do ministry.  There are several girls feeling the call to ministry.  God is at work, people!  I love hearing girls come to know Christ, and I love when they make friends, and I love that they have a desire for Scripture.  But for some reason, maybe because it’s impacted me personally, when I hear girls tell me or others that they want to do ministry for life, I get giddy.  I think that this reflects the fruit of their relationship with Christ more than some other things.  It means that they really get what Christ is calling us to do and are being selfless enough to understand giving their lives, hopes and dreams to Christ.  There are girls that want to do girls ministry, student ministry, missions, and beyond.  Some are already doing this.  I know a 9^th grader that is leading FCA at Wakeland.  She’s teaching senior football players the Bible.  Not just the happy stories either; she told me she’s teaching on “getting out of the boat,” being connected to the vine (John 15), and calling them all out on the type of language they use.  Awesome!  Others are leading in their schools or within the ministry.  I can’t wait to see how God uses so many of them the rest of this year, and beyond high school and college.

I know that you all have so many stories of what God is doing in your small groups and in your ministries.  I would LOVE to hear them!  We only see a glimpse of what is happening, and so we love to hear your stories.  So be encouraged that God is at work.  He is doing great things in our ministry, and will continue to use you and our girls.  I’m thankful that God has put me in this church, this ministry, and that He is moving in the lives of our girls.
Love,
Brittany

Orphans and Widows, Enslaved and Impoverished.

And true religion is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress. 

– James, The Bible

What does that look like? Really?

Poverty looks different depending our different situations. Orphans and widows can be defined differently for different circumstances. 

Poverty in Frisco doesn't always look like the children in the Dominican Republic with no food or clean water. Sometimes it looks like broken relationships in a family. Those with no hope. Or poor because they are placing all their worth in what those around think about them instead of the rich life Christ wants to give. 

It may look like chains put on not by sex traffickers but by self doubt or believing the lies that the world feeds of worthlessness of false freedom. It may look like those addicted to so many things that they think bring relief - drugs, porn, lies, cutting.  It looks like those seeking freedom from anywhere but the freedom Christ gives. 

Orphans may be lonely people inside big family systems. They might be those who are isolated in school; someone who has no friends. 

It looks different. 

But sometimes, it doesn't, and the orphans are just that. Sometimes the orphans are those in the student ministry who have just lost an only family member. Those who literally are orphans. Just like that. And it hurts. It hurts deep. It hurts those of us around them.  This feeling of helplessness. These times when the only prayers that come are ones of deep groanings, trusting that The Spirit intercedes and knows how to pray for us.  These times when we don't know how to pray because the hurt, the grief, and lack of understanding are so great.  

But the good news is that God is sovereign. He intercedes for us; prays on out behalf. His plan is so much greater than ours and He works all things for His good. He loves and redeems us. And He wants to involve us on His work to comfort the orphans and widows, the poverty stricken. We don't know everyone's story and we don't know what type of poverty or chains they may be in - whether brought on by themselves or by circumstances outside of their control. The beautiful thing about not knowing is that we are just called to love. Love them all like Jesus. And be used by Him as He wraps His comforting arms around us. 

So what does it look like for you to look after the orphans and widows God places in your life; to take care of those impoverished around you, enslaved to difficult chains to break-the invisible chains we put ourselves in? What would it take for you to open your eyes and see past the outside mask of people around you? To see them with the eyes of Jesus. 

May you be comfort and be comforted in this season. 

Dear Intern 1 | The Beginnings and Scripture

I have an intern this year. It's weird that I'm at that stage in my life. Flip back a few posts and you can read about when I was the intern. I learned so much through that time. 

I've been wanting to write. About ministry, about life. I was thinking through how to best equip my intern this year and decided that it might be cool if I started a journal of sorts to her so that maybe then she can read through it and hear my heart. Plus, it's good for me to process through writing. I thought that it might e a good outlet to share with the blog and others, besides the Intern could learn too. 

Here goes. 

I want to share with you some things I'm learning. I know i don't have it all figured out, but I want to contribute daily to your life. I sincerely believe that God teaches us things everyday. He's constantly speaking to us, changing us to become more like Him. So in order for me to pay more attention to those teachings, and because I think it might be beneficial for you to learn as well, here are some daily learnings. I think that documenting what God is doing highlights themes throughout various seasons and allows us to go back in years to come to remind ourselves of what God has done. It will hopefully allow me to become a better girls minister along the way. 

Many of these learnings may pertain to the ministry, some may be relational, and others may just be about life. They might be something you're dealing with right now or that you have trouble relating to, but might come across in the future. Either way, I'm going to share them with you. 

November 11, 2013

Be grounded in Scripture. I know this is important, but I was reminded of just how important today. 

Hebrews 4:12 says that all Scripture is alive and active, more powerful than any double edged sword. Wow! Scripture also says that apart from Christ we can do nothing. Nothing! Not that apart from Him we can do something halfway or just enough, but we that are lifeless without Christ. This means that if we are not seeking Him daily- through personal times with Him in His Word, then we are basically dead. Lesson of today is to meet with God daily. Personally, intimately. It makes all the difference for our attitudes and who we are. The purpose of our lives is to love God and to bring Him glory, and to love people. How can we do that if we are not knowing Him more though Scripture? Knowing more how to relate to people as Christ would?

Being grounded in Scripture is also important because as teachers, we must teach Scripture. Doesn't the saying go "teach/write what you know"? If we are not studying and learning throughout the week, then our lessons come Sunday or Wednesday will be empty words. We will not have allowed time for the Spirit to speak to us so that we can teach. 

This morning I decided that I'm not going to turn on the coffee pot until I have spent time in Scripture. This means that as I was sort of rushing around, I still made myself pause to read but didn't have time to make the coffee. Did I die of depravement? No. But I did realize that I rely on caffeine too much to get me through the day. So instead of starting my day with material energy, I was able I be filled with God's word. 

And what resulted was going into situations that might have had the potential to be saturated in disappointment or bitterness with a positive attitude; not allowing my circumstances to effect my attitude. It gave me a better eternal perspective throughout the day. 

I was reading through Samson's story after my normal reading plan because that is the series we are in as a student ministry. It was good for me to read the story again not only because it came up among the staff today, but also because there was some convicting stuff! At one point, as soon as Delilah cuts Samson's hair, The Spirit leaves him. However because he had been traveling down a path away from God with the philistine lifestyle, he had no clue that the Spirit had left him. Terrifying. How often do I go for days without reading the Word and not notice that the power of God has left me? May it never be said of me again that I was unaware of the power of the Holy Spirit leaving me. May I be fully grounded in Scripture. 

So please, whether you're in ministry or not, be in the Word. It is life. It gives life. Make it a priority and start your day with The Lord. 

A Weekend in Pictures

There's much life to catch up on, however I want to show you part of my weekend so far.  Today was  a good day. Here's what it looked like:

 Fall has come to our home! Red flirts with the green and bursts towards the sun! I really love Fall and the colors all around! Fall sure looks different here than in Arkansas. Its like I'm searching for it, while there it was right in front of my face.

 Thursday I felt like I was back at Grace College in Santiago, but it was just Legacy Christian Academy. Chris Hurt spoke and so Alexis, who was back in town from Ouachita, and I went to support!

 Friday Night Lights with these friends to see some students!
Alexis is on the far left, Jacklyn and Chris (our middle school pastor and his wife) and myself. 

 We were creeping on Alexis before she saw us, and this is Chris and Jack's face of annoyance at her ignoring us. haha

 Aww! Frisco Band, my heritage.  Don't miss it, but thankful for those days. And proud to see some of our students doing so well in the FHS band.

The craiziness of Friday night! I come home after having to call the cops on some "suspicious youths," or "mala juntas" in Uruguyan, in the football stadium parking lot and find cop cars outside my house!  They had pulled some kid over and just happened to be in front of our house, but it was startling. Plus, they were there longer than a usual speeding ticket is so I think something shady went down.  This sums up the neighborhood that I live in. Cue Elvis Song!

 My life. I thought I had escaped the band world, but I'm being sucked back in. (:
Brady is a freshman at Wakeland High and in band. So we found ourselves at several marching band events this fall. Wakeland advanced to Area last week, so these pictures are from their area performance. Awesome!

 

 He's one of those mellaphone players, who seem headless with their horns up.

Being at band stuff is also an awesome opportunity to see several of my students

Some of my students are probably in these pictures. 

 Brady's the one in the center! Can you tell I'm sort of a proud sister?  Brady's band, after today's results, is headed to State! They're the only band from Frisco that made it to go on. Exciting times.

 Another one of my students! (:

 Then the rest of the day looked like this. Relaxation in my cozy little home.

So maybe not enough schoolwork done, but overall it's been pretty fantastic.  Life in the city is certainly an adventure.  Not the type of adventure I thought I'd be on right now, but the Lord is good and faithful and I'm very thankful to be where I am.
Church and Fall Festival tomorrow! Maybe I'll keep this little blog a bit more regularly. (:

You Know You're in Girls Ministry When....

You know you're a girls minister when you hear things like:

• Girl 1: Brittany, you'd be proud of me. There was a stripper pole on the party bus and I didn't even dance on it!
• Girl 1: I didn't dance on it, but Girl 2 did. She's really good at it. Girl 2: It's my new profession!
• Girl 3, about giving birth: I wouldn't like for my legs to be all open with all those people around. Girl 1: That's how I am all the time!
• Girl 4: I hid the glo-sticks in my bosoms!
• Boy 1: Brittany, I'm having girl problems... *continues to spill drama worse than girls do*
• Boy: That's what the girls fall for: the baby face...
• Girl 5: Jesus' mother was Mary. Oh my gosh! I wonder if Mary had a little lamb?!!
• Girl 4: No. We don't kiss boys.  At least not until we're like 40!
• State your name and a weird fact: Girl 6: She's Girl 7, and she loves One Direction so much that she knows all their blood types.
• Girl 7: And I know 1D's birthdays. You don't????
• Boy 2: I'm going to come to the girls' paint war party. Hittin' up the ladiessss!
• Intern: Brittany, your coffee addiction has rubbed off on me after spending so much time with you this summer...
• Youth Minister: I'm trying to be manly!
• Girl: Jesus was subtweeting in the story of the Good Samaritan. Awesome.
• Girl: Momma doesn't let me use the decorative soap!
• Youth Minister: Brittany, can you come build my desk/fix this thing with these tools, etc...
• Girl: Brittany, we need to talk. I think I want to go into ministry when I grow up.
• Girl: What do you want to be when you get out of college? Girl: A Brittany. Or just a girls minister.
• Girl: Brittany, I have friends now. Thanks for praying for my small group.
• Girl: Today I accepted Jesus into my heart.
• Girl: Brittany, You're my best friend!
• Girl: I just wanted to call from college and tell you how awesome my life is right now and all the great things God is doing!

You see things like:

• Girls painting boys' toenails in your living room
• Bible study turned into dance parties
• Lots of tears and emotions
• Girls calling you from the school dance to fix her broken dress
• Student Minister wearing bows for VBS
• Lots of laughter
• Volleyball games twice a week
• Girls finding community
• High school girls taking interest in the middle schoolers
• Students called to ministry, surrendering life

You say things like:

• Girl, when we wear skirts, we keep our knees or ankles together.
• No, girl, you can't sit however you want.  We try to be ladylike.
• Girl, let's not wear shirts quite so low.
• Why is the coffee always gone so fast?
• Girls, Jesus' love for His people is like Hosea's after a whore's
• We are so similar to the Whores of the Bible. Redeemed.
• Let's not play hair and make-up in church services.
• Hey Baptist Congregation, Let's all stand up and dance...
• Girl, your hair is huge today! (oops...)
• You are God's masterpiece and He loves you so much

Reading Scripture on Technology | Viewing Scripture, Part 2

My last post discussed how we can accurately view and teach Scripture.  If you didn't read it, you can read it here.  There is a second part to my thoughts tonight. I'd also like your thoughts on this one.
One classmate responded to the question with a decent answer on how it is dangerous to add our own thoughts to Scripture, which is good.  However she then stated, "As bible teachers we are under a divine mandate to teach the Word of God in spirit and in truth and the best way to do that is to teach from the tool itself.  Many today use the iPad, cell phones and other technological ways to read God's Word which is ok, but I still believe that as believers we should never replace the hard copy of the bible for anything else."
Ummm What?!
So this is how I responded.. Too harsh??
I feel that I must disagree with the full statement that "as believers we should never replace the hard copy of the bible for anything else."
I do agree that there is something sentimental and nostalgic about holding a Bible in our hands. It is good for us to hold books and to underline and flip pages; to touch the Words of God. I personally prefer this over technology. However, at the end of the day, the Gospel is the Gospel and whether it's being read on a computer, iPad, ancient scroll, or hard bound book, God's Word is still alive and active in people's lives. The same is said of reading Scripture in different languages. One cannot make the jump to say that if scripture isn't read in the original Greek, Hebrew, or Aramaic, then it has been replaced. Sure sometimes the weight of each word might change, but God is still speaking through and to His people. We cannot confine God to English, when there are thousands of other languages in the world. God is a God above language and above paper and pen, screen and typed letters. This makes our relationship with God so personal and unique - He longs to know us where we are at.
I feel like the "technology war" for Scripture is the same way. I think that God is still pleased that His children are reading His letters if it's on a tablet or if it is from pieces of paper bound together. He is not bound by little boxes in our minds or to pages or scrolling websites. Each person is different, and some find it more personal to read from their phones. This could be a benefit when people are on the go. There are also useful tools coming out all the time that help in studying, teaching, and learning the Scriptures.
I still prefer my paper Bible, but I'm not comfortable confining God to a statement saying that God cannot speak to people in different forms, when the Words are the same, and God is still moving in our lives.
_______________________
Thoughts??

Viewing Scripture, Part 1

Working on my Master's courses tonight, I was faced with an interesting question, and wanted to post the question for your opinions and wanted to post my response, also for your reactions.  It's a question that church leaders often are faced with and wrestle with.  Hopefully it does not strike you as too difficult, but if it does, maybe you can use this as an opportunity to learn.
The topic was giving the Bible the prominence that it deserves as teachers of the Word.  The exact wording was:
What can we do in our churches to give the Bible the prominence it deserves and how can we ensure that our Bible teachers use the Bible as the text and not just the curriculum guide?
Here's my opinion:
In our churches, there are a few ways that we could give the Bible prominence as we teach people.  For starters, we can believe that the Bible is the inerrant Word of God.  God spoke the words and they do not contradict each other and are completely true. As leaders, if we do not hold this key truth then what we are teaching will reflect that.  As we believe this and teach this to our congregations, we put more emphasis on Scripture and its importance in speaking to us.  We allow Scripture to speak through us in what is taught and in how we act.  It does not need to be added to and it is not appropriate to take bits of scripture to fit our own agendas.
Secondly, we can teach from the Bible.  There are several good books in Christian circles, but the Gospel can stand on its own.  Scripture speaks for itself enough that it does not need to be choked out by human thoughts.  Emphasizing Scripture as the curriculum instead of a topic would allow for teachers to use the Bible as text instead just the curriculum guide.  It isn't bad to do book studies every now and then, but if that is the only thing being taught, it is time to get back to Scripture.
I also think that if we allow Bible teachers, such as Sunday school teachers or small group leaders, the freedom to pace their class, Scripture could be relied on more.  Some groups need to camp out two verses at a time while others prefer the entire chapter.  Each group has different dynamics and when church leadership constricts every group to the same method, despite differences that may work better for a group, teachers are more apt to see the curriculum guide as more important instead of using Scripture as text.
Finally, if we instill in our churches the weight of the gospel and the importance of a personal relationship with God through His word, Scripture will take the prominent place it deserves.  If the people of the church place the Bible as a lifeline, priority in their personal lives, and the teachers allow for Scripture to penetrate every aspect of their lives, then the standard of prominence for the Bible will rise.
_____________________________________________

Thoughts?

A Little Tea Party!

Previously in our student ministry, the girls ministry consisted of a girls retreat in the Fall, Revolve Tour in the Spring, and coffee dates the rest of the year.  (As well as supporting the general student ministry happenings).  Well, after review of a Girls Ministry's purpose and goals, we have changed what we're doing.  Girls ministry is best done throughout the year, and my goal this year is to know more girls that tend to be on the "fringe," doing things that are more "grade-specific."  So we're doing many small events this Fall, trying to include more girls. Thinking through this has stretched me, creatively, more than I thought it would.  It has also taught me a bit of how to diversify for different ages.  6th Graders don't always need to hear what 11th and 12th Grade girls do.

So our first event was for the 6th grade girls.  We had a tea party!!  I wanted to share some of my ideas of what we did.
Purpose:  The goal of the night was to make the girls feel special, girly, and like the princesses that they are.  We talked about how we are daughters of the King and that he loves us so much. As their first official student ministry event, I told them how excited I am that they are now part of the student ministry and that God is going to do big things with their time in this student ministry.  We talked about being valued in God's eyes and shining for Him like Princesses in their schools.

How to Tea Party: 
The Invites: I used invitations from this great site that were easy to edit.  I gave them to the girls a few weeks in advance.  They were cute little reminders.
The Food: Because 6th Grade girls are probably not too thrilled about hot tea, I tweaked the script and we served pink lemonade (what drink is more girly?) and raspberry tea.  The girls were pretty excited about the raspberry tea, and had red mustaches the rest of the night!  I ordered cupcakes from my favorite cupcake bakery, Dimples Cupcake Factory which was a hit! Those cupcakes are huge!

  
We drank out of mason jars, and the girls thought that was very special! Haha!  The goal was girly, so I tied ribbons and put tulle everywhere!  To go along with the lemonade theme, I found awesome Hubert's lemonade bottles (after drinking the delicious lemonade, of course) and they contributed to centerpieces.  The tables also had some mason jars with lemon drops and whoppers (malt balls) in them.  I really wanted some giant pink gumballs, but couldn't find any that were cost-efficient enough.

What we did:  When the girls got to the party, they mingled a bit and started drinking and eating snacks.  I had put on the tables these super cute cutouts of cupcakes that they played with as girls were walking in.  It was nice for them to have something to do with their hands and to do, because with 6th graders sometimes conversation with new people are awkward.
(Apparently I didn't take a picture of the actual cutouts)
I also found these free cutouts to make your own photo booth! The girls really loved this! It was really easy to make, I just printed these out on cardstock and cut away.  I set up a banner in a corner and it made for a perfect photobooth!

Finally, we played some get-to-know-you games because I didn't know everyone and they didn't either.  We spent thirty minutes learning names and random facts about each other.
Then, as time came to almost leave, we waited for parents and played "pterodactyl" which is played by keeping your teeth covered at all times. The person to your left tries to make you smile and show your teeth by making weird noises and saying "pterodactyl."  We laughed so much!



These girls are some high school students who helped with the evening. It was awesome to have them invest in younger girls and to have them help with setup and cleanup!
In hindsight, I would change a few things.  I would not host this event on a Friday night during Texas football season.  I didn't think that high school football would affect 6th graders, but this group of girls has many older siblings and a large group of the 6th grade girls went to the football games, which was a bummer to me.
Overall, the evening was a success.  The girls who came were known and I feel like they felt special.  They heard truth and had fun in the process.  Even though not as many girls came as I thought were coming, the ones that did were girls I didn't know as well, so it was a good opportunity for me to meet them.  Not a lot of planning was needed because the girls just wanted to talk and be silly! Their stories were random, but they were heard and are important to the girls.

New Blog Launch

Hey folks!

As many of you know, I'm a girls minister for FBC Frisco. And in trying to be the best girls minister I can be, I have launched a new blog that chronicles learnings from girls ministry. It's partly documenting my journey to figuring out what it means to be a girls minister and also hopefully a resource for others in the field of girls ministry. I'll still keep this blog updated, but I'd love it if you checked out this other blog: 

Girls Ministry Learnings:

https://girlsministrythoughts.wordpress.com/

Also, happenings from our student ministry/girls ministry can be found here: https://bluegirlsministry.wordpress.com/ 

May The Lord bless an keep you and may His favor shine upon you. 

Happy weekend!!

The Plunge

Well, I finally did it. I said goodbye to simplicity and comfort and frustration and finally jumped into the world of smartphones. Hello team iPhone! I've always tried to keep my life as clutter free as possible and stood my ground when all my students tries to convince me to come out of the dark ages. But I've given in. And you know, it feels pretty nice. I'm actually typing this post on the phone right now. The wonders of the Internet! This little box can do all sorts of amazing things! 

Here's the challenge I face: keeping the simplicity. 

I know that The Lord calls us to remove distractions, live more simply, but in today's world we don't always do that. We get busy and add apps and tv shows, more after school activities and turn the music up loud. And sometimes in doing all that, we lose the wonder. So as good as The Lord is, He gave me the right words this morning. I was doing my devotional (I'm going through Ann Voskamp's 1000 Gifts devotional) and this morning's was titled "Urgent Grace."  She talks about how God gives us time, but so often we don't have time for God. She goes on to talk about how being in a hurry can often lead to regret because we miss the moment we're in due to worry over the next moments. Hello! being fully present in each moment, each conversation is so important! 

She then says, 

<blockquote>"Life is so urgent it necessitates living slow."  </blockquote>

Because life is fleeting, we must take in the moments and be slow, reverent. In Christ, time is not running out. We lose time when we don't sit before Him to fill. Because in the filling, we gain time. 

<blockquote>"We stand on the brink of eternity. So there is enough time. Time to breathe deep and time to see real. Time to laugh long, time to give God glory and to rest deep and to sing joy." </blockquote>

What words I needed to hear again and again. I'm so fast to neglect spending time at Jesus' feet, in His Word when life gets busy. But the reality is that when I begin each day with filling myself with Him, I gain time and perspective and all the rest falls into place. 

So as I enter the world of smartphones, may I - may we - not lose sight of being present. Of giving attention to conversation instead of virtual social media. 

May The Lord fill us as we take this urgent life slow. 

Top 10 Things Overheard at Revolve 2013

I took some of my girls to Revolve Tour a few weeks ago, and I made up a list of top 10 (or 12 actually) things that happened or were overheard.  They probably just sound dumb if you don't know these girls or weren't there. But here they are anyway. Better late than never!

• They’re climbing in yo window…snatching your snacks up. Hide yo sour patch kids, hide yo m&ms. ’cause the rats are all up in here!
• Drool and jaws drop as Anthem Lights takes the stage. High pitched screaming follows.
• I’m not sure who is screeching louder, Kelly Scott or the rats??
• ”We didn’t sleep all night! And we’re not tired. And we wrote new songs on the guitar we learned to play just now.”
• Upon meeting Anthem Lights: “Hi whats your name?” Danniee: “Ummm…Uhhh, Christina!”
  Later: “Who’s Christina?? I completely forgot my name, he’s so attractive!”
• What should we do with 40 girls at midnight? Pack out McDonalds and feed them ice cream!
• Bullying is cool #saidnooneever
• Can we be best friends with Britt Nicole?? -Molly Sexton
• I’m never washing this hand again!
• ”Nothing abnormal about riding a wheelchair at church and 1:00 a.m”
• The service is over and it’s time to go…where are all our girls? Oh, that’s right. We’ll be waiting on them for the next few hours as they talk with bands and speakers. Waiting…always waiting.
• After waiting, we get kicked out…again.
• Why is it that we got kicked out? Oh yes, because Molly and Courtney are freaking out and running laps in the worship center.
• This is Love. And true love is not a what but a Someone.

A Letter of Hope

Dear Girls Minister,

Thank you for your letter of encouragement last week.  I hope this letter, this response, finds you well.  From your last correspondence I could tell that you are at a busy time in your life, and I hope that I have included the parts of my story as you asked, that will benefit your ministry.  In order to tell you of how God worked in my life, I must tell you of the background from which I come.  It’s a long and hard story, so bear with me.

As I reflect on that time in my life I can only say that God carried me through.  Up until about two years ago, I didn’t think that I would even make it to the next day.  But here follows the story of God’s work in my life.

Broken.  That’s the only way to describe the first eleven years of my life.  I cannot recall the details of my biological mother’s face or even the house we lived in.  All I know of those eight years was fear, pain, and rejection.  The smells from my father’s bedroom, which I can now label as Weed and alcohol, were strong enough to kill any sense of smell, but especially in a small child.  The anger that came from that man was emitted on my face, my arms, my legs.  It’s a wonder that I even learned to walk properly.  I’m not sure what it is that I did to cause such anger, but I guess being born was bad enough.  Once Carly and Samuel were born, those beatings became more frequent and I tried to protect them.  They were so small.  If I could just keep them from experiencing what I had gone through….  The way he would look at me, and the thoughts of what he might do – again – haunted every waking moment and were amplified as I slept.  Sleep was supposed to be a release from the troubles, but not in that home, not ever.  Broken, that is what I was.  Broken, dirty, used.

The days were always cloudy in my mind, and once the smoking started again, the clouds would increase and my mind would become fuzzy.  Was this normal?  Would it ever go away?  Carly heard on the radio somewhere, or perhaps at school, that praying would solve your problems.  So we tried that for a few months.  We would pray to have a good life, to be taken out of this hell mother called home.  Did it work?  Did whoever we were praying to even hear us?  Obviously not, because we stayed there.  Two more years we endured.  More years than I care to count feeling like a whore.  I’ll spare you every detail, but looking back it was nothing that any little girl should ever have to live through, much less remember.

The clouds broke one day as sunshine came in the form of uniformed officers.  The moment was terrifying.  There were guns and masked men.  Dogs were barking angrily and running through our house, headed straight to the closet – the closet where the plant my father told me was an “herb” lived.  My parents were handcuffed and forced away.  I made the little ones close their eyes and hide in their room so that they would not have to see the scary scene.  Only when I was much older did I learn that one of the neighbors had heard the beatings and suspected drug use.  I did not cry as they took them away.  I did not cry as we were loaded up in foreign cars.  I had learned long ago that crying did no good, it only brought about harder beatings.  

I learned that this raid was good for us kids.  We were taken to a place where we could play.  I stood back and watched my siblings.  Who were these people here?  How could we trust them?  I could hear adults talking about us and making decisions about us.  The control was never in our hands.

They told me we were going to live with a new family, a nice family.  I didn’t believe them.  What adult was nice?  I’m not sure I even fully understood the word.  We followed the instructions given – what choice did we have, and what could be worse than where we came from?

Hesitantly I began a new life.  The people in this new home were kind.  They took us to this white building where we sang songs and learned about some guy named Jesus.  He seemed nice and Heaven sounded like a safe place.  That’s where my faith began.  This home felt safe.

We lived there two years and then we moved homes again.  I did not cry as we left.  These people were not as kind and we didn’t go to the white church anymore.  We went to school and then we came home.  We went to school and then we came home.  Monotony.  Life was not bad there, but it sure wasn’t as good.  Then, when I was eleven, we were told we were being adopted.  All three of us together.  Cool.  We met the mom and dad who they told us that they had been praying for us and they were excited to become a family.  So what?  My calloused heart wanted to believe them, but what I knew of family wasn’t so great.  We obviously agreed to go with them because any place was probably better than the second foster home.

This family showed love.  A new kind of love that I had never known.  They brought us to church, but this church was different than the white one.  The buildings were red or tan, and we didn’t just sing old songs.  People were friendly and wanted to know me.  I met you and some other women who cared about me and some girls my age.  A few I recognized from school.  Sixth grade is an awkward time for anyone, but for me and my untrusting self, well let’s just say I made it harder than it had to be.  

As the year continued, I became more and more open to the new parents.  But not too open.  That was dangerous and could lead to hurt later.  I wouldn’t cry.  My siblings seemed to really love these parents, so I could protect them less and think about myself more.  

I started spending more time with some girls from church.  Bailey and Kelsey and I became inseparable.  My timid walls began to come down, but I replaced them with craziness – which in reality was just a cry for attention.  I craved so much attention.  These girls began to love me, and I them.  I finally had friends.  We could tell each other everything but I still felt that something in my life was missing and that they didn’t know all of me.

That spring we went to a conference and heard a singer speak about true identity.  About being a daughter of the King.  As she spoke I felt this longing to have what she was talking about.  But what did it mean fully?  I didn’t understand, and I didn’t want to open myself up for more pain.  Besides, my identity was tainted and broken by my biological parents.  The thoughts of what she offered nagged at me, urging me to change, but in small group, and to you, I knew exactly what to say.  I knew how to put on a good masquerade and show the world that I was ok.  Mrs. Katy, (you remember that she was my small group leader?) probably saw through my game, but loved me anyway.  She would tell our group good things that really helped with problems at school.  And while she said true things, and worship in Blue was fun to be part of, the reason I kept coming to church was just to see my friends and to get away from my family for a while.  They kept telling me to read the Bible, but it was so big and old and I didn’t know where to start.  

My crazy actions in public kept gaining me attention and I realized that this satisfied for a short time the longing inside of me.  Boys started to notice and before long one asked me out.  He saw value in me and wanted me.  I knew my adoptive mother would flip if she found out, so I kept him a secret.  I hid that among many other things from people.  I gave the world what they wanted to see, and lying about my life became an addiction.  I think Bailey and Kelsey could see through it, and I think it hurt them, but at the time I didn’t care.  I was protecting myself.  

Finally in seventh or eighth grade, my mother found out about the boyfriends.  She found out about the “non-age appropriate” videos from YouTube.  In my mind they were just dancing, but apparently that wasn’t good enough for her.  The consequences that she put in place for so many things were constricting.  I felt trapped and pressured and broken still.  The hurt from my past was so great .  I lashed out in anger.  I felt that so many people were worried about me that it might be best for all of us if I stop existing.  Many times I thought about how to do it.  Pills were too unreliable, and we didn’t own any guns.  But this had to end!!  The thoughts swarmed until that day you came to my house unannounced.  Do you remember when you and Mrs. Katy wanted to talk to me about some things?  What resulted was an excuse for my mother to tell me all these things she didn’t want to confront me about alone.  This gave more fuel to the fire that wanted to end my life.  However, you seemed concerned about me.  It was as though you were on my side, listening to me.  I told y’all of a time earlier that day at La Hacienda Ranch when I wanted to escape; when hurting myself seemed like the only option.  I told you that I didn’t not believe in God, but that I couldn’t be certain that there was a God.  I told you that I had stopped reading the Bible and devotional you had given all of the girls earlier that year.

And suddenly, I felt a bit more free.  Telling the truth, even when I didn’t know how to fix it, seemed to bring me closer to freedom.  You listened.  And I mattered.  I wasn’t just one in a crowd, and I wasn’t broken in y’alls eyes – maybe still in my mind, but in your eyes I could see myself differently.

Do you remember what we did next?  You suggested that we start together.  That small thought-change began with Jesus, and that He heals brokenness.  You suggested that we could all use a little accountability and decided that you, Bailey, Kelsey, and I would read through Philippians together, discussing it along the way.  This accountability was intimidating to me at first, but then Jesus began to speak to me.  Years of feeling abandoned by Him faded as I felt His presence.  I began to look forward to the girls ministry events that we would have every month or so because it meant I could hear how Jesus was changing other girls’ lives and I could hear truth spoken from girls for us girls.  One time we had a giant girls weekend, but you then turned it into more frequent, short night events, so that we could bring friends, have girl-time, and listen to each other’s lives.  I don’t think I ever told you, but those nights were some of the times when I was encouraged most.  I began to see myself as others saw me – not as a whore, but as a daughter of God.  

Throughout high school, God turned my brokenness into a place of healing.  Because of my small group on Sundays and deep Bible study on Wednesdays, I was able to hear God’s truth and read His Word for myself.  I had a craving to know Him more and more.  I couldn’t wait to tell others how he had healed the holes in my heart.  Jesus took away my destructive thoughts.  I no longer thrust myself into the arms of the world, but was whole in Christ.  My relationship with my siblings became healthy and I began to trust men.  Only a little though.  Our accountability continued for a long while, and I realized that not all of the girls had this.  Do you remember the discussion we had about this?  I began reaching out to younger girls.  We would do life together and middle schoolers were encouraged by high schoolers.  I served more and I began to see how the church worked. I was inspired as I saw you encourage the small group leaders, having coffee with them on Sunday mornings, or taking interest in their lives throughout the week.  It made an impact on how they related to us girls.

So, This is how God has moved.  I don’t recognize the person I was, wanting to end the precious gift of life God gives.  I was playing the part of the Creator instead of allowing Him to do so.  You asked me to describe where I am now.  Well, I’ve been at college for two years now.  It’s been a long road, but I am plugged in to a church that I’ve been attending since the third week of school.  I am being mentored by my favorite professor’s wife, who happens to love the Lord more than I thought was possible.  I never thought I’d make it past eighth grade, but here I am.  I never thought I’d find Christians in this secular school, but I did.  God is faithful and He’s using my story to help encourage kids coming out of the foster system.  He makes people whole.  He restores relationships.  He makes brokenness new.  And I cry, because when I think about all that God has done in my life, I can’t help but be overwhelmed.  

I’ll be home for spring break, so let’s catch up then, ok?  I’m not sure what God has next for my life, but the fullness He brings is enough.

Love always,

Shannon.

**This story is one of hope.  The background may be a little more exaggerated than what I fully comprehend, and the end is what we hope happens, the names have been changed.  But this my heartache this week, the burden I've been petitioning God about.